Please, buy me this bass. You know you want to. You have to. You must. There is nothing in the universe more important right at this moment than the simple, inescapable truth that I should have this bass. You know it, and I know it.
It's $10,400.00, and worth every penny.
It's the only thing in life that will really make you happy, and it will certainly make me happy. Forget about all those other things that cloud your judgment with false hopes and fleeting moments of pleasure. Imaging the joy you'll feel knowing that you made me so happy by buying me this bass.
Please. Buy me this bass.
Let's get real: we all know there are questions, eternal questions, unanswered questions, about life, about existence, about the role we play in the grand and glorious panorama that is life itself. Well, here is the answer, truthseekers:
Buy me this bass.
This message brought to you by the Buy SheaNC This Bass or He May Never Be Truly Happy Ever Again, Probably, Foundation, LLC.